False Advertising in Eastern Europe Can Get You Killed



Last Wednesday, all of the people from the Technical University had a big "Welcome Back" party celebrating the start of their new semester. Although inconsequential, the party happened to be at the same place as the last party I wrote about. (Note: To avoid any confusion, I do NOT attend the TU, but as these parties are for everyone, I was there nonetheless.)

All things considered, all of that has little to do with this update. What I'm really here to talk about is Slovakia. More specifically, a Slovakian, home-distilled, plumb-flavored alcohol called "Slivovica". I mean, this stuff could take the paint off of a car, and yet at the same time, has an extremely pleasant aftertaste. You can go ahead and say it with me now, "Uh oh."



In any case, most of these big parties start around 9:00pm, but don't really get going till roughly midnight. Knowing this from our last experience, we opted to do a little drinking beforehand. My friends Laco and Kvetos (Slovakian and Czech, respectively) came by to partake in the pre-party festivities, and Laco happened to bring along the Slivovica.

At this time, I'd like you all to take a closer look at the label on that bottle, noting two very important points. (circled in red) Firstly, we should understand the fact that the contents are 52% alcohol, and that that little cirle is NOT the Solvakian symbol for proof. Secondly, and more importantly, we have the fact that this bottle has an illustration of people dancing... that's right, you read correctly... dancing.



Well, it just so turns out that they really weren't kidding about that dancing thing. For those of us who might have a hard time seeing what I'm getting at, here's a more visual representation for you:

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Horrible, yes, I know. You can see that I fought it to the end, scowling with each and every gyration... Sadly, there was just nothing to be done. Go ahead, you can cry too, it's ok, I'll understand.




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